I wrote an article almost two years back about female vulnerability. I reference it from time to time because it was at a period in my life where I was beginning a relationship with someone and I was a questioning how to let them in. I was not able to be raw on any level. They were resistant to the fact that I was always busy, always planned, organized and running my own life. There was no room for them. It made me think some two or so years ago, how as women we are told to be these strong, independent powerhouses, yet that seems to not be what attracts men. We are told to put on our armour and walk with the men, in business, in the gym, walk as equals. However, with years of sexual inequality genetically programmed into our existence, we naturally cary a fear of being called or seen as weak.
Sometimes it feels like everyone is really to kick that New Years butt all while you’re just trying to get out of bed... I get it. And I’ve felt that way and you’re not alone!!! Between being sick & then catching a mean case of the winter blues the past week... I know first hand it can totally kill your motivation to get up and hit the new year running.... or do pretty much anything! After some of my own experiences and research, I put together a list of some of my fave natural ways to fight those winter blues, depression and feels of anxiety you may be facing. Some of my tips here ⬇️ but feel free to share your own....
I feel as though I am not me… I am my acne. These are RAW images. ALL 100% untouched and feature NO make up.
The first from two months ago with absolutely no make up, the last one is from yesterday.
I’m sharing something here that’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I feel so embarrassed and confused. I don’t feel like myself. I searching to find her again but it’s getting hard and I don’t see her in the mirror recently. I want to be my happy healthy self who is confident and thrives in her body. With makeup sometimes I can find her. But I’m not really her right now and the past few weeks I haven’t been.
I started my first blog back in 2015.
The story begins back when I was in fashion school in NYC from 2010-2013. I was addicted to blogs and Tumblr but I never felt the need to be a fashion blogger. Lifestyle bloggers were few and far between at the time, and fitness gals barely existed besides BBG cult followers. What drew me to the process most was the aesthetic and styling of the images. I would save picture after picture in folders on my desktop (pre Instagram and certainly pre saving and filing away on there! Thank G-D for that feature!). One folder was fitness and the other lifestyle/fashion. My two alter egos. So, I spent hours and hours on tumblr with no idea how to start anything remotely blog like and therefore I didn’t. I was young and the idea of starting seems so far away. In retrospect, I wish I had but regret is a useless emotion. That being said, my now boyfriend tells me that on our first date in 2013 in NY he asked me what were my goals after I graduated. I told him I was going to be an influential blogger. He was one of the only people I told that to… and I didn’t know why at the time but I trusted him. He also now tells me at that moment he thought… okay, this girl has big dreams and what the heck is that even?! Ha. 5 Years later, he now is my biggest supporter, the best photographer and teammate!
Have you ever felt scared to try a new thing?
I’m going to guess, yes! Probably a few times a week, maybe once a day… I feel this weird feeling all the time. Fear. But still a feeling of excitement, perseverance, possibility, drive and often that makes me so excited... until it because anxiety. I think its a common thing to many of us, and I certainly am still trying to figure that out. Why does fear hold the hand of excitement?
I can see myself years from now, someone interviewing me about my life, or my business or perhaps just my kids asking me what the scariest thing I did in my career was? What was the biggest risk I took? I can see my mind flash over everything that’s brought me to that point. In all of my triumphs and obstacles I have and expect to face in my projected career, I can’t imagine anything being harder than falling in love.
Patience may be what allows any of us to find true happiness.
When I was 20 I thought that being happy meant working towards things you want. I thought that it meant focusing on what was to come, how exciting it will be when you get there and how beautiful the end destination will be.
Every year brings new excitement. One of those areas is always in work for me. I am pumped to kick off the new year with lots of success and partnerships. The motivation is key to hit the ground running, but there may be something blocking you from doing so...
I call it mental clutter. Mental clutter is when physical clutter in your cyber word and physical space become too much to handle that they clutter the way you process ideas and information in your mind. I have been guilty of this too many times, so this year one of my new years resolutions is to clean our that clutter that creeps into my mind. Here are my ten tips on how to reach successful with a clear mind...
1. Clear out your computer desktop.
Seems simple, but so many people have a bunch of files, photos and information piled on their desktops. Although it may be important to hang on to, toss whats not and file away what is.
2. Toss old note books that are filled with notes and lists you don't need.
I am so guilty of this. I make lists for everything. Sometimes when I can't sleep I'll make lists of my time blocking for the morning down to each minute. It helps me calm down. But holding on to all that keeps you holding onto stressed from the past. You don't need all those extra notes. TOSS.
3. Empty your wallet of old receipts and cards you don't use.
Yes, that old ID that is no longer valid but has your first picture as a teen on it. DITCH. You want to mentally and physically make room in your wallet for money that you'll be making. It may sound crazy but its part of the visualization in your success.
4. Delete apps from your phone
There will be 25 new ones coming out this year you'll absolutely need to download. Thats the beauty of technology. So clean up your phones apps and let those new ones like Sweat or Quickbooks rule your new fitness or accounting goals you just made for 2018.
5. Unsubscribe from email lists your still on.
I open so many emails and just hit delete. Every day. But seriously, they send me emails every day for the past... well years! And still, we are all guilty of it. Staying on those email lists instead and deleting them daily instead of just dropping out of their contacts. You may move back to New York one day, but the juice bar on the corner having 15% off next week won't be valid when you do. Unsubscribe.
6. Delete pointless screen shots saved your phone.
Make a folder if you must... something like, outfit inspo, or "note to self when mad: he said all these cute things" folders. But don't keep pointless screen shots of random sales from blackfriday 2016 please. Clean up.
7. Pick 3 unfinished projects from 2017 to have completed by the end of January.
Some of these are simple projects to complete. All you need to do is think about why you didn't finish them. Were you lacking time, motivation or was it just something you just simply can ask someone for help with. More times than not its a small final detail you left hanging that stopped your from finishing that project. Reach out.
8. Clean out the piles of to file papers on your desk
Physical clutter is the worst. It will ruin your day. I always clean my desk at the end of my work day (sometimes 11pm) so that when I wake up the space I see is clean and fresh. It leaves out the old stress from the day or maybe year past. If you have piles of papers on your desk sort through them, toss, pay, file and move on.
9. Check all of your flagged, unread of draft emails.
There is no reason anything is left that long besides the fact that you put it off and then forgot about it and it found itself in the word of cyber space clutter. If something was never sent, its probably for a reason. If you need to shoot it off, do so immediately, go through those unanswered requests and make room for new opportunities.
10. Pay old debts.
Pay off any strange unpaid expenses... like a car bill, an old ticket, a credit card you forgot about. Its all part of the manifestation. When you clear that off your mind and your debt you allow yourself to make new money with ease and confidence.
These are 10 easy ways to start clearing out clutter and kicking off your new year on the right foot. Make room for opportunity, career chances and partnerships to come, more money, and leave your mind clear and accepting of the challenges and changes or 2018. Hustle hard babes.
** use code TFF 20 for 20% off the Samuel Reiz coat featured in the image above**
Well, its that time of year again. Time to spread the cheer. I am infatuated with gift giving, the same way I am in love with sharing my favourite things with all of you each day via @thefitfatale. I get to gift those I love with the products and experiences that changed my life.
Through gifting, I have been able to share the excitement, the health, beauty and wellness parts of life... and now you can too with our ULTIMATE GIFT GUIDE.
You asked for it, so here it is!
Full disclosure, nothing on this list is sponsored. It is 100% organic and just things that I absolutely love!
Fitness & Health Accessories
GIFT CARDS & EXPERIENCES
In light of the quickly approaching darkness that is full blown winter, what can be called cuffing season is upon us. For those not familiar with the term, cuffing season refers to a time in the year when “people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves, along with the rest of the world, desiring to be tied down by a serious relationship”….. it can also be referred to as cuddle season.. although the cuffing term is a bit more… aggressive. What you prefer is up to you.
Cuffing is a derivative of “handcuffing” even explained in Vogue as essentially chaining yourself to another person throughout the season. I mean... it's in the pages of Vogue! Although the initial thought may excite you … what I am really interested to know is why some of us may choose to cuff ourselves to a perhaps meaningless relationship to feel a sense of security while empires could be built with the use of that time. So the question here is, to cuff or not to cuff?
Don’t get me wrong, I totally understand the concept. It gets cold out, days are short and nights are long so who better to watch Netflix with than your naked handcuffed buddy, but is this a relationship or is this a bandage on an insecurity…. And for the sake of understanding this keep in mind, neither are wrong. Finding a partner because you choose not to be alone is okay, even if you didn't pick that partner because you were absolutely infatuated by their existence. That being said, I am not a fan of mediocre and perhaps you aren't either which may leave you curious as to weather or not cuffing is for you….
I’m not sure if you've ever seen the Sex and The City episode where Carrie breaks up with Big and goes on to explore all sorts of things in her free time. In the words of Carrie Bradshaw in the "Single and Fabulous" episode ;
“Being single and fabulous also frees up one's weekends.
Saturdays usually spent browsing with him in Soho are left for more practical things...
...like power walking with your single and fabulous girlfriends."
Many of the most successful entrepreneurs have done so while single. They have chosen to dive into the success of themselves and their self care rather than the time spent with someone who may just be a bandage for society's norms. I'm not saying this is all relationships. Not at all so please don't think that. I am just curious why people try and hold on or even find something safe when it may be so far from right.
I used to be more of a relationship girl. If my boyfriend from when I was 19 read this he'd strongly agree. My favourite holiday was valentines day and I loved date night, dressing up, posting kissing pics, the whole shebang. But again, I was 19. I wasn't focused on who I was becoming as person. By building that individual and nourishing what I had to offer to both myself and someone else, I would in return find someone later in life who would give me that same reward, not just companionship. At some point in my life I made a conscious decision to work on myself and repeated the lyrics over and over “to find someone you love, you need to be someone you love”…. That being said, we have a whole plethora of people who not only don't love themselves, but don't necessarily love their partner, they are just …. Well, cuffed. And often times far past the season...
I also want to put this out there that I am not saying I don’t want a relationship. In fact I do. I love going on dates. Getting to know someone ... but it takes time. Its like friendship.... you connect for some reason and then ultimately one day you realize that someone is your best friend for life and thats the end all say all no matter what other friends you meet. Thats what I want from a relationship. The absolutely unapologetic love that it hurts so much. It absolutely could crush you but its the best thing in the entire world. It stands besides you in your own fight. It loves you. It lets you love yourself more than you love it (it being the relationship). Ultimately at the end you're stuck with you and only you. No one else is forever or guaranteed. Sign a paper and put a ring on it (which seems to be the trend RN on my FB), but everyone will make their own decision no matter what is cuffing them down.
The number one question I get asked... after how blogging is my job, is why and how am I single? Interesting question. I always look at them with a perplexed face and respond with something like "What do you mean how? and why?" .... Single people are often looked at like these creatures that are so foreign to couples. I see it even with my best friends. They prefer you to be in a relationship because it makes them able to understand you better. If you are not in one, you must be looking for one... but why cant you find something that works?
The answer lies within yourself. When you see your life how do you picture it. Are you successful with an amazing supportive husband and making the money you want from your dream job. Are you fit, healthy and glowing. You pick your own priorities in life. 100% relationships are part of that, but that doesnt just mean having a boyfriend. It means your family and friends, men in your life who support you fully to be the successful female entrepreneur, exec, or what ever that goal is for you.
Everyone, you do you, but in my experience.... if you choose to spend your time on a person make sure they are worth it. Make sure they are supportive of your biggest dreams. That they challenge you intellectually. Emotionally. Physically. That you give something to them as well, in the form of support and wisdom. Make sure you laugh... a lot. Make sure you enjoy the same wines and have lots of sex. Make sure that you think that person is as absolutely loving of you as you are of yourself. Or else, why bother spending all this time bettering yourself to only feel that this incredible person (YOU) is now cuffed down.
So at a time of year when you may think, to cuff or not to cuff, maybe ask yourself have you really even been tied down to yourself long enough to add another person into the mix?
FITMAS - yes an obvious play on a Fit Christmas, is 12 days of health challenges both mental and physical. The 12 days of Fitmas is designs to help you share love to yourself and those around you this holiday season. The days start with lots of self care and end with bringing that presence to others. Check out the 12 days below and their challenges here. Each day associated with a brand.
Each challenge entry via instagram stories receives one entry and each instagram post receives 3 entries. If you were on top of your challenge game and did all 12 days your points double. You still have the chance to enter for up to 3 days following the challenge by picking your favourite challenge and re-doing it. You must be following myself and all the brands from each day to win final prizes!
Day 1 - Healthy Warm Holiday Breakfast
Challenge of the day: Make your own healthy and hearty WARM breakfast. Just because you may eat sugar free, vegan and clean doesn’t mean you have to skip every holiday tradition. Warm foods help the body digest. In the winter our body’s natural rhythm is to slow down… just incase you didn’t notice. Picking warmer foods, breakfast, veggies, and smoothies packed with foods warm in nature such as cinnamon, nutmeg turmeric, ginger, cayenne etc will help your body ease while slowing down. We suggest gluten free oatmeal…. and share what your favourite way to stay fuelled in colder busy days is. Pop into Rejuice if you have time, share my fave oatmeal recipe and mention that its available at Rejuice for the month of december with Vegan eggnog latte) IT IS CALLED THE FITMAS REJUICE MENU. They will have it all of December along with their Eggnog smoothie they always launch for December.
Tag of the day: @rejuicenutrition
Day 2 - Plank Challenge
Challenge: Plank it out…. Start the next 10 days with a plank challenge. The goal is to hold your plank for 2 minutes. Start with 15 seconds if you are so unfamiliar with the idea of a plank, keep your butt down, back flat, core tight, and abs engaged. Each day add on 15 seconds from what you can do.
Today's challenge is about realizing that you can achieve anything you want with little progress each day. If you decide that you want to manifest something incredible (fitness or otherwise), keep working towards it. It is all within your reach.
Tag of the day: @sweat
Day 3 - Take 10 Minutes
Challenge: Take 10 minutes for yourself.
Today, take 10. For you. No one else. Turn off your phone. Make your favourite matcha. Make time for your most adored face mask. Read a magazine. Search a blog. But do those little things you love. Those are the keys to a healthy life. To kicking the stress out. Taking ten minutes..... I call them my Matcha Minutes in the morning .... can change your entire day. You don't need to be full on meditating to help clear your head. Today, share what you love to recenter yourself and it may inspire others in the same way.
Tag of the day: @vitalproteins
Day 4 - Set Your Intentions
Challenge of the day: Set your intention. You do not need to share what that is with anyone but yourself, unless you want to of course, then we are all ears. When everything seems to be spinning around you, crystals are known to ground you back to your intention. Crystals or not, having something that pulls you into your element and reminds you why you hustle over the holidays (usually to bring joy to others around you and thank them for their love and support all year) will help with your mental state. Find peace and calmness in your actions.
Tag of the day: @rockingvibe
Day 5 - Give a Gift that Motivates
Challenge: Gift someone you with something healthy you love... something that was part of what changed your life. It could be an intro pack to spin classes, it could be the IBCAA's that helped you change your eating routine, or your fave healthy snack that keeps you going (and not hangry)... but chances are if you guys have a lot in common, a great friendship and you care about that person, they will probably feel the same way as you to discover a new healthy habit they'll love.
Tag of the day: @Noms @proteinworld
Day 6 - Give a Gift With Meaning & Memories
Challenge of the day: Gift someone with something that has meaning and memories tied to it. Maybe you will make personalized cards that share what you love the most throughout the year and inspire others. For me thats health so I am sharing my favourite recipe on personalize printed holiday cards.
Tag of the day: @staples
Day 7 - The Most Easy (and healthy) Holiday Cookie Recipe Ever!
Challenge of the day: Try our easy to make holiday cookie alternative. It can be hard to make healthy (and easy) deserts over the holidays. Everything that is easy is often high in fat and sugar, not to mention chemicals. For today's challenge we are suggesting you try out oh so simple holiday cookie idea.
Buy your favourite protein bars and a sharp holiday cookie cutter. I used @nagi protein bars because they are so yummy and also flat, which is perfect for this. I cut out little stars and voila, healthy holiday cookies. Pick a flavour like chocolate chip coconut to keep your guests happy with their treat.
Tag of the day: @nagi
Day 8 - Get some vitamin D
Challenge of the day: ... all about getting outside and getting some vitamin D. Today I challenge you even when it's cold, to not let it stop you from getting some fresh air, clearing your head or seeing friends. Vitamin D, which we are often lacking in winter due to our habits to hide inside, is crucial in fighting depression and other mental illness, plus plays a key role in bone health for all my fitness girls out there. Stay warm in @noizeoriginal vegan winter coats and don’t let the cold stop you from getting out and about about. Send me your shots today taking anything from a 10 minute walk to a hike, I don’t mind just get moving and breathing some fresh air.
You can use code FITMAS on the @noizeoriginal website for 15% off your order…. Holiday shopping done right
Tag of the day: @noizeoriginals
Day 9 - Show your hair some TLC
Challenge of the day: Show those locks some love today! Sometimes hair gets the last of our love during the colder months, but like skin it gets dry and brittle in winter. Today is Saturday, so take a second and love your hair. Do a treatment, blow it out, and try not to wash it so much this season. Buying new appliances also helps to care for your hair. I find when I do my hair properly with a blow out it last longer, I don't need to wash as much and it doesn't dry out as much. Currently putting on a hair mask and relaxing today. How do you love your hair in winter?
Tag of the day: @conaircanada
Day 10 - Send Some Love to the Women in Your Life
Today is all about sending love to those women in your life who support you. It could be your mom, your friends, teachers, trainers... just other women who are standing beside you and ready to lift you up, not tear you down. We hear about the bad sometimes more than the good, its the way media is designed, but today lets spread love. Post and tag someone who deserves to be called out for their constant support, love and compassion. A little thank you note, instagram post/story or maybe just a hug can go a long way today.
Tag of the day: @lavieenrose & @moutonvert
Day 11 - Out With The Old and In With The New
Challenge of the day: Donate your old gym clothes to charity! Too much activewear in your closet? Make room for the new gifts and products on your wish-list by cleaning out your home and mind to allow for the new. It will also motivate you to stay on top of your game at the gym ;)
I love gutting my closet for a new year... especially as you receive more material things, think about how you can declutter your mind and closet to have a fresh approach to your fitness game for the new year.
If you know those pants are flattering and you won't want to wear them to spin class, why hold on to them.
Tag of the day: @Industryactive
Day 12 - Do a good deed
Challenge of the day: Do a good deed for someone who may need that extra little big of hope at this point in their life. They may be alone over the holidays. They may be going through something. They may be homeless, struggling financially, mentally or physically.... And you may know just what they are going through, if its a close friend or family member. But if its not, chances are that person in line in front of you at Starbucks still has something they are dealing with. Everyone has a story right... so today, I am asking you to be compassionate and loving by doing a good dead for someone else. In return, for every good dead you share I will donate 1$ to help buy kids running shoes this holiday season.
Tag of the day: @newbalance
To win you must be following all the brands.
- 1 of 3 Rejuice Nutrition Gift Cards
- A SWEAT Holiday Gift Box
- Noize Original Jacket
- Fitbit Charge 2
- Industry Active Outfit of your choice
- 120$ to spend on NewBalance.com
- 100$ towards hair appointments at Wonderblush
- Box of Nomz
- 100$ to spend at Chez Anna
- Vital Proteins Matcha and Collagen Creamers
- 200$ to spend on Rockingvibe.com
- 150$ to spend on Titika.com
- Conair Meta e Meta smooth and wave hair curler
- La Vie En Rose Gift Card
I speak a lot about mental health because it is something that fascinates me. It is also something that has hit very close to home over the past few years, knowing friends, family and myself included who have all been subject or struggled with some form of mental health disease or challenge.
If I had to pin point one area that always seems to either be the cause or effect of a mental health issues it would have to be memory. I remember when my brain was recuperating from my concussion, memory, trying to remember the little things like words… and even why I walked into the other room were effected. Then of course this made me depressed and frustrated. You can also argue that memory has a positive side and when in good health can be used as one of the most successful ways to overcome mental health issues, eating disorders, anxiety.… The practice of remembering that last time this happened everything was okay. Or remembering that you want to chose healthy. Remembering what your most confided in therapist, friend or family member would say even if she is not there. Memory loss or frustration can also be one of the biggest stems of mental health issues like depression. Take for example Alzheimer's Disease which in fact does not qualify as a mental illness, but it can cause symptoms related to mental health, such as depression, anxiety, agitation, and hallucinations.
I believe that fitness and physical health play such a big role in how our mental health thrives. What we eat and how we eat ultimately build our cells that either welcome or inhibit the growth of disease and infection. There is a ton of research that shows us foods that can help prevent and reverse some of these signs of disease. While overcoming my own brain trauma and recovery, I had the ability to research a lot about brain health and what to eat to recover and prevent illness.
I had a concussion. Which caused confusion and memory loss. Leading to short term depression and anxiety due to the blur that was passing through my mind constantly. The fog you survive in. I am still overcoming some of these symptoms that now arise mostly from lack of spacial awareness and grounding… ultimately motion sickness.
Alzheimers disease is one very near to my heart. Also relative to memory loss. Also causing Depression. Frustration. Agitation. Hallucination.
My grandmother passed away from Alzheimers over a year ago. She suffered with the disease for what seems like a life time, but probably more like 10 years, progressing slowly since early development. Most of my adult life. For the beginning she was always forgetting the little things, repeating herself, mistaking one person for another until the ultimate climax where her body eventually forgets how to live. The frustration of the forgetfulness and the diseases impact brought her mental health issues like agitation and depression, especially in the later years.
When my grandma passed away I was the only person here in Montreal. I remember that day so well. You build a strong family and a strong network for the reason that when tragic things happen you will not be alone. You don't have to face your mind alone. You will have your parents, siblings, cousins, friends, significant other and so on by your side. For some reason the timing fell on a day when EVERYONE and I really mean all of them, were away. I felt really alone. I felt selfish that I felt alone. And that I didn't know what to do. But then a realized that beyond me, this was how every person suffering with the disease felt. How my grandmother had felt for years struggling mentally and physically alone. Every single victim of the disease feels lost as they slowly forget their support team, their education, their moments that have made up their lives. My mom never left her, even when she forgot who people were, even when she forgot how to speak. My mom knew that the love of being by someones side meant more than the mental ability to understand someone being there. She knew that the little expressions of love went beyond that and possibly into another life, into better karma and better energy.
My mom is an incredible woman. She got into the art gallery world because it helped her find a way to share and preserve memories through the visual arts. I did the same with photography at a very young age. I remember the day I got my first camera and I was so obsessed with taking pictures and sharing them with everyone to so they would remember the trip/event/night.
As my mom’s love for art and her struggle in coping with my grandmother’s growing illness grew, my mom Marina Cutler of Avenue Art Mtl made it her mission and “karma” project to work towards funding art based programs helping those suffering with Alzheimer's cope. Visual art has a beautiful way of stimulating memory as you work through what each visual conception means to you. From colour to figure. I remember how we would always colour with my grandma when we would visit her in her later years. She loved to just watch towards the end even when her colouring ability was no longer there.
Alzheimers has affected 5.5 million Americans this year. It is the 6th leading cause of death, killing more than breast cancer and prostate cancer combined. It may be something that is affecting the older generation, but now with chemicals, poor eating and more negative mental health habits we are seeing younger and younger people diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer's. There is never a time too early to start feeding our brains with healthy brain foods. Foods that prevent the disease and promote brain health.
Foods that help prevent Alzheimers
1. Curry or Turmeric
2. Foods with Omega 3 Fatty Acid; such as avocado, and walnuts.
3. Foods with Vitamin C and E; such as broccoli, strawberries, olive oil and almonds.
4. Foods with Flavonoids like apples, blueberries, cranberries, grapefruit, asparagus, Brussel sprouts, kale, garlic, onion, spinach.
5. Foods hight in folate containing b6 and b12.
6. Wine (YUP! WINE!)…. a study showed that drinking up to 3 glasses of wine per day reduced the risk of Alzheimer’s disease by a whopping 75 percent.
What you can do?
Eat healthy foods that feed your brain. Pay attention to your mental health and care for it.
Most recently my mom has been working to make this coming Brush Off Painting Competition in collaboration with PBS an outstanding success. The Brush Off competition is an art competition for emerging artists. Finalist receive monetary awards to further their career. Finalists work will be exposed for an evening along with live music, food, drinks.
The event is Thursday, September 14th, 2017 at WESTMOUNT SQUARE from 6:00 to 9:00 PM and tickets are 75$ going towards funding the art programs for those suffering with Alzheimer's.
Buy tickets or donate below. It would really mean the world to me!
Get ready to jump into the unknown just before summer comes to an end..
This year’s Mont-Tremblant Wanderlust is heading our way this weekend. I have actually never been to a Wanderlust festival which is part of the reason why I am so excited to experience this uplifting wellness retreat. I have heard amazing rave reviews in the past about all that it entails and finally will get to experience it myself.
The concept of Wanderlust is that “Transformation Begins Here”. The world of health is a big part of mental health... The experiences we live and how we digest them in our world become our lives. Wanderlust is a festival that perfectly embodies both mental and physical health practices.
The mission of Wanderlust “To help you find your true north. True north is not a final destination: it’s a path, a journey, a yearning to explore and connect to your life’s purpose.”
If you are interested in attending, here are all the details.
When: August 24th - August 27th
Where: Mont-Tremblant, Quebec
What to know: You sign up and basically get to book a mix of classes throughout the days you buy passes for. Some of the classes book up quickly so have a look. There are other pop up shops on site, healthy food and of course the beautiful setting of Tremblant.
To purchase tickets click here.
I could say a lot of things about this taboo topic of body image.
I say taboo because no one likes to bring it up.
Everyone talks about it.
Everyone thinks about it.
But are we real about what goes on? Do we let people openly discuss their struggles....
From my experience there is a missing link between what we see on social media and the reality of bullying that is taking place ..... telling people they don’t look good, or the opposite, telling someone they like the way they look in a sexually harassing and abusive way.... this is all still body image bullying and leads to insecurities and unhealthy habits towards LOVING our bodies.
Social media has totally altered our ideas of body image and what the norm is. It has altered our idea of what is socially acceptable, partially because people can hide behind their device and say what they want as a bully.... And I have experienced it all. I was just in Europe traveling around the world while an older man was abusively sending me comments from behind his screen at home about how I have no life and no one cares about my fitness pics. Rather ironic don't you think?
That being said it also opens up the floor to timid people (myself included when it comes to some personal things) and lets them post and open up and not think about the fear or what they are really doing. I'm guilty of not always sharing the full story sometimes. I don't like to dive too deep into what I've gone through and I prefer to instead lift other people up, let them be happy and confident so they can avoid what I have and do still face.
However in social media now we see more and more people wanting what's REAL. They want to know the details of what I've been through to be able to relate.
I've been through my fair share of body image issues.
I have fluctuated in weight my entire life. I was never over weight but I've been very skinny. I used to think it was cool. That it was what was attractive. That boys thought it was attractive. That my clothes looked better. That my mind was more clear. That food was the enemy. Calories were the enemy. I was high off of hunger.
If I am going to open up to this, I wont stop here. This won't be my only body image post, because there is a lot more of the story trust me… and a lot more to speak about, but I remember one moment like it was yesterday. I came in from school in New York. I was at one of thinnest I had even been... I met friends in New York who thought the same way I did. No food. Hit the gym for 2hrs of elliptical a day. Walk every chance you get. Avoid calories. Eat sugar free. Walk more and look up Pro Ana blogs. Yes thats a thing. Every single girl who has been seriously sick knows it's a big thing on the internet. Especially about 5 years ago when blogging was really taking off.... That there are tons of blogs and Tumblrs with pictures of anorexic girls... anyone who has been through something similar knows this outlet. In fact they speak about it in the new Netflix movie "To The Bone" which I was surprised about! I spent hours looking at “thinspiration" and listening to skinny love by Bon Iver.... just for the full dramatic effect. Ha! It was the rebirth of my deep tortured teenage soul… except I was 19 and living on my own in NYC with the control to eat and do as I pleased.
So one weekend I came back and I saw my boyfriend who lived in Montreal. I hadn't seen him in a few weeks and I remember he was sitting down at the front door of his parents house and tying his shoe and just looked at me and said, "babe your legs look really thin". My reaction was to almost cry in joy, WHAT A COMPLIMENT. The man I loved thought my legs looked AMAZING. I blushed saying thank you. And he said to me, no like sick skinny. Too skinny. I laughed and said haha no they are finally starting to look nice from all the walking in NYC. But he had used the word you avoided like the plague when you have any type of body image addiction or ED.... "Sick".
I loved that kid so much back then. It still seems strange to me that I never thought maybe if the person I was drop everything in the world for crazy about thought I looked too thin I should reconsider my habits.... but… thats eating disorder mentality. Thats what happens. You love thin more than you love anything else. More than you love being alive. And the worst part is that never ever ever leaves you.... as an example, you can quit smoking and be smoke free for years and on the regular look at smokers and cigarettes and think gross how did I once love that, but yet sometimes somehow you feel you could just die for one puff. Its very similar. Its the mental health side of addiction....
One moment of feeling so small and so thin... and you need it. Many of you I hope have never experienced this in the life…. but there are a lot of girls (and guys!) who go through this same process. This mentally is or was the norm in their life. I'm writing this for them. I'm writing this for my younger self. And every younger girl who follows me and reads this in hopes that they will realize that strong, powerful muscles, are beautiful.
Loving yourself is really hard in 2017.
It seems like everything is pointing in the other direction. To better yourself. To be an entrepreneur and to look amazing every day. To have full control of your own life. It shuns those who don't. Those who don't look good or get enough likes. We live in a world that is based on physical attributes and a world that is product driven.
Yes the models used to be sticky skinny and now the era of the ass has arrived... which too has it's ups and downs. And yes it was not realistic that anything would fit us the way it did a 5’10 - 100 pound model, but guess what... Now all we see are real people … some who genetically are hella blessed (god damn) and don't have to work as hard for their physical attributes. I swear some of these kids must pop out with abs already…. I came out with huge calfs over here haha... Which is my physical attribute I've hated my whole life but was also one of the most attractive features that brought me a man I dated later in life…. never over look anything ;)! Social media absolutely makes it so difficult to love your own body for what it is.
Everyone sees beauty differently. Yes there are norms set out by social for what is beautiful and those gradually change over time and evolve… like fashion. But the real issue is that social media body image norms are ruining relationships, mental stability and ultimately lives.... we have to understand that everyone has their own taste and preference. So being skinny means what then…. or not having a big ass and big lips means what... what are you left with? I'm not saying that trying to achieve what you feel is beautiful is wrong... or getting your lips done is wrong... because trust me I am the first person to say its fabulous if it makes YOU feel great and you are doing it for YOU. But dont be doing anything for social media trolls!
I don't have an answer to any of this but I think there is a lot that can be spoken about body image and the insecurities caused from the "norms" of digital. I post daily selfies at the gym... showing what I'm doing, my cute work out clothes of the day... but then when I post a fitness picture of my body, I hope people don't disregard the amount of gym selfies taken. I worked for that. You can work for that too. And NO my body is NOT perfect. Not in my eyes... not in anyones eyes. But I certainly did not just turn into this fitness driven person who loves their body over night. Physically its been a lot of work and mentally even more.
I think that the opportunity to start shifting people's minds through conversation about body image. About confidence. ABOUT beauty and that shape is good... Ultimately taking care of yourself will bring you to your optimal beauty. Your body wants nothing but health and health is beauty. It's clear skin. Strong muscles. It's no bags and dark circles. It’s strong nails and un broken hair. It's hearing that beat right.... That can push you through spin class. It's the sweat pouring out of your pores as you detox. It's the gym. It's the grocery store. Its picking healthy restaurant and healthy options.
There is a future for every person who has struggled with body image. There is a way to get stronger and more confident but you have to listen to what you want, not social media. You have to feed the good. Feed your body with the good. You have to find outlets to discuss what you are going through and we have to make it less taboo. We have to stop bullying and saying negative things about ourselves and others. We have to realize its hard work and that even when you look at someone like me.... who's lively hood is based on being "fit" I too struggled and do continue to struggle just like you.
I try and celebrate every milestone for the reason that life is just a compilation of all of those moments. Each success contributes to who we become and what “successful” path we build for ourselves. It's hard to write a story thats untold. Hell its hard to be an entrepreneur. You are alone in your fight. The only way to make it is to fear nothing. No fear of failure nor a fear of success. Yes, fear of actually succeeding is part of it as well. It means that you reached something or somewhere you've always wanted to be… and then what...
My concept behind Silver Lining by S was to help others find happiness in the little things. The daily wins that make us who we are and allow us to truly enjoy life. Through discovering those, I turned to fitness and health and my story became about that. With the evolution of me, so has come the evolution of SLBS to TFF. My goal has always been and will remain to be encouraging each of you to find happiness daily but this time through a healthy lifestyle. I am speaking to those driven, independent, hustling girl bosses who want to achieve and who believe they are capable and worthy of their full potential. They want to kick ass and look good doing it.
It's how I want to live my life. It's how I stay motivated. Its how I wake up. This is The Fit Fatale.
The Fit Fatale is that girl who can have it all and still works to be more, from health, family, career and social life. I've mentioned this to you all before but this brand is so far from being an intimidation, it's a realization that you're capable. It's to help YOU realize that YOU ARE capable. Because you are. I'm still a work in progress like all of us, but I've seen a lot this year. I've been sick from stress, a burn out I never really imagined possible at 25, only to dive my energy into the gym that brought me a life rocking injury, my concussion. Someone asked me the other day what I was afraid of. I said nothing, besides hitting my head. You know whats funny is I quit my corporate job, my stability, my identity for some, to kinda.... work out and write in the simplest of terms. Just when I did this I got my concussion from an accidental fall.... and that was one of the biggest life changing moments.
I was dedicating my energy to something else, something healthier, but my approach was still the same. Too stressed, making decisions FOR others and not myself. Yup it sucked, but I learned a lot about myself. I had already decided on the new website, the new name, the new feel. But because of that injury I learned to embody who that brand was to be.
"The Fit Fatale is flirty and witty. She is fitness obsessed. She would prefer to talk avocados than shit. She is always well dressed (even in yoga pants) and smiling. She's happy."
What's important here is that The Fit Fatale cares for herself first and foremost which allows her to go above and beyond for others. This is how she finds ultimate happiness.
When I was younger I used to write short books. Fictional stories of this girl who was "perfect". The perfect job. The perfect boyfriend. She wasn't so emotional and self-conscious as I was. She wasn't as unsure. She was certain of who she was being. She believed. So I wrote these books because it made me feel like I was her. It was a way to make my dreams reality. The Fit Fatale is that girl. That same experience of idealism. But through what I went through the past year, through the struggles of a changing body, mind, heart and soul, I can say I am that girl. As I write this I laugh because I'm so far from perfect. Thats half the fun. If the story was over I'd have nothing to say. My house is a mess right now, I have a ton of work to catch up on and lets be honest, I totally ate a pizza last night. But that doesn't change who I am. That doesn't make me less of The Fit Fatale. And the same goes for each of your stories. If you care about your health, your fitness and ultimately those around you, you too are her.
I started to slow down and love myself... Truly love myself... and part of this came from leaving the wrong work environment for me, part of this came from changing my mindset, part of this has come from my health coaching and learning to coach others along with myself, changing the words that poured out of my mouth.... If you think you're fat you will find a way to make yourself fat. You want what you believe to be true. When I started to believe I was capable and LOVE, I found the most incredible people around me. Some had been there but others started to come.
I still take a second everyday and think to myself how lucky I am to be surrounded by those people. They keep coming the more I love and care for my mind and body.
The Fit Fatale knows her worth. You need to believe in yourself to be this woman.
You need to decided you are going to be happy and healthy. Pick whats important for you. Not everyones happy will be on a spin bike, but the more you care and love your body the more you can find WHAT that happy is. Mentally and physically. Your body actually shows you and you become so in tune with listening to it you know what is right and wrong.
In fitness shoots it's kind of funny because every time I do a new shoot that I love, I feel like I can never post the old pictures. I feel like my body progresses and changes... That was a month ago, I don't look like that.... I SAY THIS ALL THE TIME. But this shoot featured here below was about two months ago and I love it. I went back on a spin bike for the first time in two months the day before this shoot. I WAS SMILING EAR TO EAR. No headache. If you've had a concussion you know how hard the recovery is and how hard getting back into cardio can be. I was lucky enough… no I was BLESSED, to have had that happen when I did leave my job and did get to recover properly. I made up my mind to take off that much time and care for myself… two months. I couldn't write, work out or travel. I just sat. I listening to pod casts and I turned on my phone to post once a day since I couldn't look at it. Oh, and I baked a lot.... But the glow in my skin and the smile from ear to ear in this picture, knowing I was back at it was everything. I decided I was going to be committed to happiness and being the absolute healthiest happiest ME. I was prepared to bring happy to my body, mind and soul and that was untouchable. It was my own decision to LIVE as The Fit Fatale. As that girl in the story.
So, with somewhat of sorrow I say goodbye to Silver Lining by S. Sometimes, you need to love the past and let it go to get to the next level of greatness. I will always tell the story of finding your silver lining in life, I just found mine and she is THE FIT FATALE.
Wearing Lole Women
Shot at Santos (one of my fave Montreal hangs!)
We should all be free. Do what you want to do in life. Don’t spend one second doing what you don't enjoy. Life is short, so dream big and take risks. So. Much. YOLO going down …
We live in a time of the girl boss. The entrepreneur. I think when our kid's kids will learn about the 2010’s, they'll call it the ‘technology revolution’. Or, the great fall of the corporate world. The return of the free spirit… the gypsy, moon children running free in 2017…..
The generation a bit younger than us 25-35-year-olds will be ever so slightly different. Those who are now 15 have a little more of a sense of control over their lives. They will grow up with full creative freedom, with the digital world at their fingertips. They will enter the work force seeing every industry changed from what it was when we first entered it. In 5 years, it will be normal to reply to your professors on the first day of college that you wish to be a blogger, content creator or flat layer extraordinaire ;) … Actually, it may even be considered normal in 5-10 years for people not to go to college, instead starting their business at 18 and learning everything from Youtube videos and the Okay Google app.
But, there are those like myself who are in the middle of this transition from the traditional. Those who have gone to school, gotten a job and kill it in some corporate giant phase, until they one day somewhere down the line they give up the stiletto-wearing, corner office dream and trade it in for airplanes, DSLR’s and start-up offices that welcome yoga pants.
This transition is natural and happening whether we like it or not. Everyone has the ability to be what they want. We shouldn’t be knocking each other down. Instead, we should be encouraging it from the get go… and some of us already are. We are all shouting out DO WHAT YOU LOVE, but there is also a part of our instinct that has to come into play when it comes to making decisions in our life - even if we LOVE it. Because I remember when I LOVED my grade 8 boyfriend too… sometimes our judgements are a little foggy when we have less experience. So, yes, instinct plays a huge part in taking that leap of faith to do what you love when you’re faced with this middle world of where you are right now. We are the “screw the norms and revolt against desk gen”, and it plays a big roll in it. The more we do it, the more our instinct becomes clearer.
This brings me back to the beginning of my article. The rise of the free spirit, risk taker, and the entrepreneur that is so wildly encouraged by others (especially women) to rise up, quit their job and take a risk in doing what they love. WHICH I AM 100% FOR!!! Do not think this article is anything but that. However, there is a calculation to your ‘on-a-whim’ judgement calls that comes from taking risks in the past. It is my belief that instinct is learned over time.
Essentially, the more risks you take, the more positive outcomes from those risks you will have. Let me explain. Think of it this way: A girl says “I should probably quit my job and follow my dream of blogging”. She then quits said job and has no money to pay rent, food, and basically, survive. Girl goes to then get a new job. So, first off, I would suggest starting with a smaller risk or instinct testing point, if you will. At the end of the day, rise or fall, the best way to learn how to trust your instinct is to follow it. That may just force you enough to put blinders on to the world’s cautionary tails and run full force into the fire. Every part is worth it.
Everything I've done and accomplished that has ever made a huge change and worked out for me has been by following my instinct. Every one of those things I was told not to do by countless people. I guess because I was told not to I was even more sure I wanted to. It tested me. By following my instinct over the years I have learned what my instinct is. I have learned how to listen to my body, my intuition, my conscious and subconscious alerts and signals. I have learned, from my own past experiences, when to go with something and when not to. We can’t all just live freely, and throw caution to the wind everyday. But the more you do, the more you can preach it. It becomes an art: The art of trusting your instinct.
I am always asked if I consider myself successful. I am happy with where I am, but I am happiest with where I know I am going. So, yes, I do consider myself successful, in all relative terms, but one of my biggest achievements is learning the art of the instinct and using it to get where I am going. Stick around for the ride.
The renown and spectacular hotel, The Mandarin Oriental in Miami, invited me over for a digital detox.
I first thought it was a detox experience for digital influencers. After a second look at the invitation, though, what they had invited me to do was a full digital detox… like, put-away-my-phone-for-7-hours type of detox. I wasn't sure I was so into the idea. Actually, I even thought it sounded strange because they wanted me to share my experience of it… take pics and post about it, but I wasn't allowed to have technology or any of my digital devices. Weird, right? Wrong… Not weird. Just my instant reaction to try and find a reason or excuse to turn it down, since it was out of my range of what normal is for me.
The experience was going to push my comfort levels of having my phone on me at all times. Plus, the itinerary of the day was already calming - AKA: Disruptive to my non-stop attitude, which I pride off of (and also the detrimental factor of any and all of my crashes).
When I don't have to listen to the chatter or what’s in my head, I get tons more done, otherwise, I tend to think too much. The thing is… we need to dedicate time for these moments, where we do listen to what’s in there and not block it out with technology and being too preoccupied to hear it. Then, it won’t always be trying to get to us in every sort of way…
I live at the fast, crazy pace I do on the regular and don't take any time to slow down and stop… or rather - I did. Now I do take a little time, especially after a few things have happened in recent months (like getting sick with an infection and getting a concussion from a training accident) have forced me to. In general, though, people always ask me how I do as much as I do. People around me will answer that I don't sleep. I just say spin and endorphins keep me going. During all of that non-sleeping time, I have plenty of time to be on my phone. So, yes, days like this day, full of digital detox, are necessary.
It’s been a pretty big daily struggle finding the beauty in the balance of slowing down and killing it. It’s like that saying goes, ‘too much of a good thing isn't good anymore’… Well, too much go-go-go is no longer a success tool because eventually, you just can’t keep up anymore. You actually start to lose value in what you can offer. Days like this digital detox should be necessary for everyone, at least once a month - even once a week - to just put your tech away and get back to what you are really thinking and feeling. It’s kind of like rehab for your phone addiction!
So the day included the following:
Morning Yoga - Private yoga session in the sun by the ocean
Meditation - reflecting on intention
Tibetan Singing Bowls - This was wicked. After our yoga and meditation, our incredible teacher (and seriously, she was so beautiful inside and out during this session. I was so inspired by her) played what are called singing bowls. These metal bowls were placed on our body and lightly tapped. Their vibration is said to help with stress reduction, holistic healing, and overall balancing of the body. It made me feel so relaxed and is totally something I would make as part of my daily routine if I could.
Juice Snack - yummy healthy juice!
Colouring - a relaxation activity to challenge the creative mind
Private Reflexion time (for me, this was tanning by the pool)
Healthy Lunch - Included fish, grains, veggies, fruit, chia pudding, and tons of water, which felt amazing!
Digital Massage and Body Scrub - This included a massage that targeted all the parts of our body that become stressed by using technology; face, head, shoulders, arms, hands, back, and feet. They explained that our shoulders turn in because of the tension from curving in while using our phone. Processing information all of the time also stresses our face and head muscles.
Overall, the day was incredible. I left feeling so relaxed without having been on my phone and reflected on where I want to go next. It was such a liberating feeling. We also picked vision cards for the day. Mine was, “The mind is everything. What you think you become.” This was pretty spot on for me because my word for the day was ‘risk’. To take risks. To play a harder game because you can only win at the game you play, after all. If you don't set goals higher than you think you can achieve and you don't push yourself past your comfort zone, you will never succeed. It’s a mental game. How can we participate in it if all of this tech blocks out our own thoughts?
Thank you again, Mandarin Oriental, for creating this beautiful experience. I strongly suggest it for anyone.
For more information or to book you experience click here.
Who is officially ready to kick off Summer 17' with LOLE?
This summer I am so excited to announce that I am a LOLE Ambassador....
Which means fully embracing the LOLE lifestyle. What is that you ask? Living out loud everyday.
For everyone that probably means something different... which is totally normal! For me right now that means a few pretty spot on statements about how I'm changing my game and focusing on me.... in the best possible way!
Living out loud everyday means not questioning everything but rather living. The questioning takes away from all the fun. Yeah pretty much nothing in life has an answer.... so lets for one second think what happens when you stop trying to solve that problem or find that answer. Part of this lifestyle is accepting that it is going to be okay..... That uncertainty is the beauty in it!
Living out loud everyday is about making choices that scare us.... and having a lot of fun!
So here are my 3 ways I plan to live out loud everyday this summer...
What are yours?
Rock the Boat Just Enough
Stir it up! Seriously cause trouble. Throw a little gas on that flame. It could probably do you some good... Rocking the boat means making choices that are just on the edge of acceptable... and maybe quite frankly aren't but they make for a better story.
Part of becoming who you want to be is throwing caution to the wind every now and then. I am always looking for people who will take those risks with me.... Make that damn story better... because its the only one you're going to have. I promise you that.
It's really starting to seem like it is all flying by, so summer 2017... lets rock the boat. You don't think I should, so maybe I will. Just follow what you want, go for it... don't just add the guac that costs extra but double up on that hot sauce too.
Skip the Comfortable Choice
STOP PICKING WHAT IS COMFORTABLE. Okay this is a big one! A huge big freakin problem so many people face. I see it all the time when it comes to health. People are actually scared to pick the RIGHT decision because its not the comfortable one. Like making a healthy choice.... if your norm is eating unhealthy. Or staying in. Not traveling because you'll spend more than you should... or that plane ride is just too long.
Ill be honest, you probably will spend more than you should, and you may having anxiety taking off on that plane if thats your worry, but whats going to come out of it is way better.
Stop picking easy. JUST KEEP PICKING THE SCARIEST PATH. Not the one that makes you nauseous (thats probably the wrong path) ... your body does start to tap into its senses and it will tell you... but the one thats scary. There is a difference. Scary for the good reasons.
Like moving.... to no where. To travel. To book more flights instead of pay more bills. Stop making the easy choice. The comfortable choice. if you want to be in a different city do it. If you need to move on from someone, a friend, a relationship, a job.... do it.
Growing pains are good. Uncomfortable is GOOD!
Drop the Innocent Act
You want to be successful? Stop blaming other people for anything and everything. Just dont do it. You've got to take responsibility for who you want to become if you want to live out loud everyday. Its a commitment to who you want to be versus who you were.
The change is scary... but embrace it. No one else is solving the problem for you. And no one else is the problem. Once you learn that you gain power. Everything and everyone is a reflexion of what you give off, speak and live.
You're not so innocent. You have the power to make a huge impact in other peoples lives. The definition of innocent is "not responsible for or directly involved in an event yet suffering its consequences".... UM AS IF! You are hand picking everything, you are controlling your life. Its a compilation of all those decisions that makes THIS. What ever this is, it is what you will construe.
Own the crap out of it.
It is your life.
Live out loud every damn day babes.
Outfit:Head to Ankle LOLE
Tracking and Notification Band:The NEX Band
Location:Restaurant LOV in Old Montreal
Bottle:BKR 1L Bottle
(Photo above by the insanely talented Sanni of We Took A Picture)
We need to talk....
Why is everyone always hating on bloggers. It seems to be the new trendy form of bullying. I must have missed the memo...
There are so many people and respected professions out there. Of course, too many where people aren't given the credibility they deserve and most recently it seems like bloggers and digital influencers are all the biggest trend to tear down, shit on, and condescend.
Guess what, there are real people behind these blogs and you picking at them, their work and undermining what they do still hurts that person behind the brand.
I am so fed up of people telling me what I do has no purpose. Is fake. Is not worthy of money. Or time. Or what ever else their measure of value is that day. I work my ass off.
I have a business degree from one of the most prestigious business and fashion schools in the US, where I graduated with a 4.0 GPA, a working background in marketing for some of the biggest brands and fashion retailers in the industry today, and started my first company at 18. And guess what, there are TONS of bloggers and digital influencers who are just as if not more freakin kick ass! We don't bring this up to brands on our spare time, but if you're going to start knocking down what we do, the quality and professionalism behind the real blogging world, you better know there are some talented professionals who will happily speak up.
So what ever negative energy you choose to bring me and the tons of others putting their lives and creative work out there for YOU ALL TO ENJOY, think again.
Are you seriously becoming happier by telling someone what they do is of no value? That the art of photography has no value. That creative skills and writing have no value. That shooting behind and in front of the camera has no value.... all while every single brand out there from bread to tiling wants to work with influencers and bloggers?
Look I know not everyone is going to be the right match for a brands market and I couldn't agree more. It's why I think its important to find brands that match with the right spokesperson, model, photographer, videographer, author, marketing strategist, public speaker, comedian, stylist, hair stylist, make up artist, business owner and curator.... pick the right one for your brand. Brands do it every day and respect all these jobs… but yet people cannot find it within themselves to respect bloggers WHO DO EACH AND EVERYONE OF THESE THINGS EVERY SINGLE DAY!
Tell me I am mistaken here but to me this is the most absurd thing I have ever heard. Sure there are tons of people who try and get “free shit” or so it's called, but if that person is doing a job for you, producing quality content, are they not worthy of that payment? And PS there are the rest of us, staying up late, writing contracts and invoices, registering our brands and paying taxes for that work you undermine, coming up with more content and marketing campaigns a night than the 10 employees in some marketing department do in a week... so please don't tell us we are not worthy of your money, time or contract. You are in need of us.
I thank this industry every single day for the brands I have grown with, that believe in me, that book me, work with me, support what I'm doing and want to do more time and time again. I am so thankful! And thankfulness goes a long way. Its grounding. Its reassuring that you are in the right industry when you feel blessed to be surrounded by the people who "get it". And thankful I am, but that does not mean I undermine my work and the value of it. Thankfulness is not the same as being lucky. Thankfulness is paired with those who work so hard they are blessed by others that can appreciate their countless hours... even if put into a flat lay. Because that flay lay looked freakin fabulous. You gained hundreds of sales off of it. You used it on your social media account, and your website, free of charge. Its actually the new header of your website this season, after you switched out last seasons campaign shot by a photographer you paid a couple grand, but our work, you were not certain merited pay or even a product.
Appreciate peoples talents.
Appreciate the arts and the value of the arts.
The constant struggle to get your product (website or otherwise) to what you want it to be. The time and money put into blogs, domain names, graphic designers, web designers, accountants, lawyers, additional photographers, videographers, equipment, computers, phones, travel expenses, transport, beauty expenses and tell me again why I am not good enough to be considered a professional.
So tell me why you don't like my instagram feed. Or you think my body isn’t how you want it to be for your product. Or you think my reach and photos aren't worth what I ask. Or the criticism that I so willingly have invited for your entertainment isn't engaging enough. Or my blood sweat and tears that I've cried (and sweat) out over the past two years of blogging isn't worthy......
of your RESPECT if anything....
Seriously, ask me again if I even work…. I dare you?
At the end of November I decided to challenge myself a bit…. with a month of no drinking! I say challenge because I am always out and it’s easy to grab that glass of wine when it’s right there in front of you… and even easier around the holidays. To be honest, there are a few reasons I did this and I’ll get to what happened in a bit, but the main focus was health. That being said, tons of other amazing things came from it that I wasn’t expecting…. Plenty of people do dry January to « detox » from the holiday season of sweets and one too many rum eggnogs. To the contrary my plan was to do it before the New Year so that I would start fresh and on the right foot.
I posted this to all of you when I was starting this mini challenge, inviting a few of you to jump on board. I actually had an amazing response and had people emailing me and messaging me about how they were in…. Mostly girls… only a few angry husbands saying their wives cut the alcohol consumption in their house (sorry boys!).
So if we look at why, it really was to have a challenge, to focus on myself and to recharge health wise for a new year. I wanted to get rid of extra bloat and be in control of my holiday munching… but strangely enough much more happened than I expected…. Here are a few of the key points that really made a shift in my December and I’m starting to think my year in general!
- My tolerence shot down a lot… and now going back to one glass of wine is difficult!
- I didn’t binge on crap during the holidays! (yay!! New year same pants!)
- I was in control of my emotions and my actions… strange enough to talk about but alcohol makes us emotional and sensitive. So do the holiday! I had a few crazy things occur but I feel like I was totally in control of my response.
- I tapped into real emotions… and trusting your body. My body told me how to feel out what was right and wrong because I didn’t hinder that with alcohol.
- I was able to wake up early, hustle and stick to all my routines!
- I partied… a lot… sober! Seriously, I was out all the time because I knew that I wouldn’t be put in a situation I couldn’t handle… I also knew I would have no hangover dancing till 3am or not.
- I was very tired staying out till 3 am because the only thing keeping me up was …. Me… and all my energy.
- I had so much fun, going out, working out, my energy was high and my mood was always ready for anything…
- I lost 5 pound and I didn’t change any of my eating habits, in fact I probably was worse just because of the time of year.
To be honest, I didn’t think it would have such an impact. I don’t drink that much in quantity, but I do drink often… out of habit… and we all do a lot more than we notice. (Let’s face it .... sometimes Friday wine night starts Wednesday with our girls…) At the end of all of this I felt amazing, thin and not bloated at all!
I went back to drinking right before Christmas. That was my time frame, November 22-December 22nd, so I could still enjoy a drink with my family and friends over the festive time. To be honest I don’t feel as awesome as I did that’s forsure….. it hasn’t even been a month and not drinking brought down my tolerence so low (like after one glass of wine I start teaching bodylicious… to my Chihuahua, low) you really feel the affect when you reintroduce it.
It was an amazing challenge and experiment to see how to the body changes and how your experiences change. I did it once for 4 months but that was over 3 years ago. I lost a ton of weight and I find your skin starts glowing and you look awesome. Honestly, I’ve had a really hard time going back to drinking because of that….
Did any of you try it with me and what did you feel? I would love to hear!!
Should we do it again for feb??